Faith Renewed
This is a letter, story my husband wrote the night before Sammie's funeral. He was so moved by all of the kindness we had been receiving from everyone around us. I updated it to make it 3 months after Sammie passed away with more of what we experienced and we sent it in to our local paper.
Faith Renewed
This Mother’s day will be 3 months since my wife and I experience the worst event in our lives that we could ever imagine. That is the day that my wife Cathy and I arrived at the hospital in labor and ready to deliver our son Samuel. Upon arriving at the hospital we were told that the baby boy that she had carried for the last 39 weeks no longer had a fetal heart beat. At the time we had no idea what had happened, there had been no trauma no signs of distress, just hours before we had actually been laughing at how active he was and the ripples of movement across Cathy’s belly. We have since learned that when labor began her placenta completely abrupted and caused our little Sammie to suffocate. I won’t go into the details of the physical and emotional torture we endured over the next few hours, as we had to go through the full labor process for a child that we knew would never take a single breath or feel his parents touch. Needless to say it is something that no parent should ever have to be exposed to. At 5:10am my wife did deliver our son Samuel, he was a beautiful 9lb 1 oz, 21 ½ inches long, he had the biggest cheeks and the cutest dimple in his chin.
Yet, February 8th had an additional meaning to me, one much more positive, it is the day that my faith was renewed. I am not talking about faith in any religion or specific deity. I am talking about a faith that any and all people should be able to embrace, faith in your fellow man, or person if you must.
It started with all the great doctors and nurses at New England Medical Center that took the time to sit, talk and sincerely cry with us. It continued with the nurses who helped dress our son Samuel (Sammie) in the Patriots outfit that we had planned to take him home in just so we could see him in it and hold him while he wore it. It also included Cathy’s OBGYN who came in from a sick day to hug us and cry with us as well.
While we were making the arrangements to have Sammie cremated, Alex Thomas and his wife Marcia from the Carroll and Thomas Funeral home in Hyde Park took the time to borrow the outfit their grandson came home in so that we could privately see Sammie one last time as the beautiful baby that he was. This was simply done as a kindness after hearing what happened.
I was further uplifted by a Supervisor at Song Airlines who waived the $100 in fees usually associated with changing a scheduled flight so that my wife’s parents could fly up a day earlier from Florida .
These feelings were compounded by the good folks at the Foxboro Residence Inn, who after hearing about what had happened and how my in-laws were having a sleepover with my 2 year old son and his cousin so my wife and I could have some time together alone provided a complimentary snack tray complete with cookies, popcorn, balloons and a credit for a free movie, all of the main ingredients for a successful sleepover party. Additionally, they offered one of their function areas as a meeting place for after the funeral on Monday at no charge.
In regards to the funeral, my wife’s grandmother worked with John Dipietro at Knollwood Memorial Park so that she could donate her plot for Sammie’s burial so that he could be surrounded by family and watched over by. John’s wife Barbara gave our Sammie a voice by writing a letter to us composed of phrases of other poems. She even read it for us at the funeral. John, went out of his way to come to our house to help us pick out the Bronze Marker that would be placed on our son’s grave.
During the days that we made the arrangements for Sammie’s Funeral we knew we never once had to worry about our 2 year old. The wonderful women at the Bright Start Child Care Center that had been eagerly anticipating Sammie’s birth with us went above and beyond so that Robbie was cared for. One of the teachers even came to the funeral and then brought Robbie home to us that evening so that we wouldn’t have to worry about him. Another teacher who had broken her leg in 3 places a week earlier had her husband driver her to our house in those first days just to check on us and drop off a gift. One of the young girls who works at the Center gave my wife a pendent with a little baby with wings on it that my wife put on the day of the funeral and has yet to take off. In the 3 months since Sammie passed they have done so much for us and we are truly grateful and lucky to have such loving women caring for our son.
Lastly but far from least are the rest of my and Cathy’s friends, family, and co-workers who took some precious time out of their lives to send condolences, well wishes and offer assistance by phone, cards, and flowers. Cathy’s second grade teacher from the Dean S. Luce School , Mrs. Foss even attended our son’s funeral after reading about her loss. Our good friends at the Foxboro Jaycees rallied to provide us with many days worth of home cooked meals at a time when eating was a distant afterthought. So many people stopped by with offers of assistance, hugs, kisses, and just to be someone to cry with and on.
People look for and find solace in many places, and I am glad that they can find it. I just wanted to share some thoughts on how some of these sources come not even knowing who I am, able to find me and my family when we needed them most.
My wife and I will never fully get over the loss of my son, nor forget him. By the same token I will never get over the multitudes of kindness displayed by the folks referenced above. This whole experience has changed me profoundly driving me to want to be a better father, husband, son, brother and friend, in general a better person. I want to be able to properly thank them by being able to answer the call whenever it is needed by them or someone else so they can have faith in me.
Keep the Faith, and let it grow.
Forever Grateful,
David Reid and Cathy Kelson-Reid
